Doing My Wife!

I ran into that guy that I was talking to in Wives I Have Fucked-Episode 1.

Here we go again:

Guy: I like how you took what I said and twisted it into a stupid joke. I don’t know where you think you’re going with your dumb Wives I Have Fucked posts!

Me: It was that conversation with you that gave me the idea to do ‘em.

Guy: Well yea, I know. It was a good idea, huh. But I meant it to be serious. Not gay, like you made it.

Me: Haven’t you seen the commercial with Hillary Duff. The one where she says it’s not nice to call things ‘gay’? C’mon be nice.

Guy: Hillary grew up into a fine young woman!

Me: Fuck yea she did! By the way, what ever happened to Gordo?

Guy: Who? Whatever. Anyway, so have you been hanging out on Fling?

Me: Yes I have! This morning I met this hot chick. Well, she said she was hot. She described herself as brunette, nice tits, tight abs! But she didn’t have a pic posted so…I dunno.

Guy: Did you send her a pic of your cock?

Me: Well, no not yet, but she has seen my profile picture…I figured I’d do that later, as we got to know each other.

Guy: Oh fuck no, you have to send one right off the bat! Chicks can’t resist when you send them a cock pic. That should be the first thing you do when you start conversating. Do it and she’ll be yours!

Me: Hmm, really? So girls don’t care about your personality, sense of humor or intelligence? They just want cock?

Guy: Abso-fucking-lutely! Why else would they be on an adult personal site?

Me: Good point. Ok, Im going to talk to her when I get home. I’ll do it!

So off I went to catch up with my beautiful Fling girl!

On the way home I figured I’d pick up a case of Sam Adams, so I swung by my favorite store, Bunghole Liquors.

I was looking at the beer selection, when all of a sudden I heard, “Hey! I recognize you from your profile pic!”

I turned around and there was nobody there in front of me. Where had this voice come from?
I looked around, but saw no one.

Then I felt a slight poking sensation on my thigh. I looked down and was amazed at what I saw! A cute female ‘little person’ was standing there! (Yes, I’m being PC).

“Would you like me to get you something off the top shelf there?”, I asked her.

“No silly, but I think I kinda know you”, she replied staring at my crotch.

“Did you loose your mommy?” I continued.

“Fuck you, prick!” she exclaimed. “I think I know you from Fling!”

“No”, I said politely, “the girl I know described herself as having long dark hair, great tits, rock hard abs and ripped blue jeans!”

“Yep, that’s me!” she said gleefully.

“Would you like a picture of my cock?” I asked.

“WTF are you talking about?” she replied.

“Ohh nothing, forget about it.”

“Well, I’m going to head back to my place”, she continued, “wanna come?”

By now I was somewhat intrigued, she could be like my R2-D2! A sidekick if you would! And I suppose it would be very convenient for her to suck my dick. So I figured WTF, why not!

I called Dd and told her what I was doing. She laughed and told me to take my time. She had some stud with a torpedo dick over the house, so my company was not needed at that time. Whatever.

As we were walking out, she told me that guys with dreadlocks turned her on. It just so happened that Bunghole Liquors had some novelty items for sale, so I picked up the Captain Jack Sparrow insta-dread wig! As soon as I put that thing I could see the wetness gathering around her wee crotchola! This pint sized firecraker was hot for me now!

As soon as we got to her place, she commented on my dreads and immediately began to give me head! I must say, she looked damn good doing it. I suppose her head is normal size, so it’s all good!
In between gulps and slurps, while she was sucking me, she kept trying to tell me about her appearances on the Howard Stern show, or some shit like that.

Although her blowjob skills wer awesome, I had to try the pussy! It took no effort at all to throw her on top of me. She began riding me like a skilled jockey. Come to think of it, she was about the size of one.

I started getting worried, she was getting soaked from all the excitement and I was afraid she would get her hot nectar all over my fucking sweet yellow shirt! Although her pussy was small enough to induce claustrophobia, it was tight as fuck and really enjoyable to slam.

After tossing her around for an hour or so, she told me she wanted to taste my cum. I was quick to oblige and deposited my wad all over her mouth and chin. She smiled so brightly as I milked my big cock, my goo dribbling down her chin.

I must say, I was afraid I might come up short trying to satisfy a girl with such a big attitude. But in the end, we had a grand ol’ time and anything else would dwarf in comparison!

Thanks again Fling!